In a spirit of Christmas cheer this week, a hospital consultant based in Scotland published his list of the latest medical slang that doctors would do well to familiarize themselves with.
Writing in the 22nd December issue of the BMJ, Dr Paul Keeley, from the Glasgow Royal Infirmary wrote about the flexibility and malleability of the English language that allows it quickly to absorb new words and phrases with ease and keep evolving.
As well as having a rich cultural history, the UK attracts health professionals from many parts of the world, and thus hospital English soaks up idiomatic phrases from other languages, as well as advances in technology bringing words from the world of internet and computing into the everyday jargon of the hospital in amusing ways.
Keeley listed a number of words and phrases as representative of what he has come across in his work as a consultant in palliative care in the UK. Here is a selection of his medical slang:
- Disco Biscuits
This phrase refers to ecstasy, a class A drug in the UK.
For example, an A and E doctor might say: “the man in cubicle 3 looks like he’s had one too many disco biscuits”. - 404 moment
Anyone who surfs the internet can guess where this phrase came from: the error message that tells you “404, document not found”.
This refers to the point in ward round when the patient’s records can’t be found anywhere, including the computer system. - Hasselhoff
An A and E injury that presents with a strange explanation.
Named after the former Baywatch actor, David Hasselfhof, who reportedly hit his head on a chandelier while shaving last year. - Blamestorming
What happens when a team made up of members from different disciplines try to blame each other for a big mistake. - Agnostication
When the doctor vainly tries to respond to the question:
“How long have I got, Doc?” - Testiculation
Using lots of hand gestures and trying to speak as if one knows a lot about something one knows very little about. - MacTilt
When the Macmillan nurse, who specializes in palliative care, tilts the head to express sympathy and understanding. - Adminosphere
The palatial offices of the senior management of the hospital adminstration team, the dean, the trust management team.
This is reminiscent of the expression “mahogany row” used to describe the “top floor” offices of the most senior members of a large corporate organization. - Administrivia
The deluge of pointless emails and other communications that come out of the “adminosphere”. - Gerifix
A collection of “broad spectrum antibiotics, thiazide diuretics, and nebulised bronchodilators (with or without corticosteroids)”, usually prescribed to older patients that are admitted to UK hospitals (usually between October and March).
Online readers of the BMJ article are invited to make “rapid responses”. This should lead to a rich and interesting collection of phrases!
“Pimp my slang.”
Paul W Keeley
BMJ 2007;335:1295 (22 December).
doi:10.1136/bmj.39414.699005.94
Written by: Catharine Paddock