Helping Kids Cope With A Sibling's Diagnosis

Main Category: Cancer / Oncology
Also Included In: Psychology / Psychiatry;  Pediatrics / Children's Health;  Mental Health
Article Date: 04 Jan 2008 - 3:00 PST

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It happens more than a thousand times a month* - another family in the U.S. is told that their child has some form of cancer. Those kids aren't the only ones who are affected. All too often, the brothers and sisters of those children can get lost in the diagnosis and their needs go unnoticed. Now, a unique program is helping to change that and it's become a model for others around the country.

It may look like a simple card game around the kitchen table, but to Paige and Kendel Meacham, it's much more. Spending time together like this was not easy when their brother, Chase, was being treated for cancer.

"I didn't really understand what was going on. All I know is my mom and dad were gone all the time and that was really hard," says Paige.

They might have felt somewhat forgotten, but they're certainly not alone. More than 12,000 families deal with a cancer diagnosis every year* and most of the time the parents' reaction is similar.

"A child is diagnosed with cancer and the entire focus becomes that child, understandably so, and sometimes they forget the other siblings at home," says Micah Skeens, PNP, at Nationwide Children's Hospital.

That's why experts at Nationwide Children's Hospital have developed a unique program to help those families every step of the way. From teaching kids things like breathing techniques to better deal with anxiety, to assigning them homework to better relate to their families.

"We require that they go home and once every two weeks they communicate with their parents so that they understand what their parents are going through and so their parents also understand what the siblings are going through," says Skeens.

By initiating those conversations, experts say siblings feel like their concers are being heard and their questions are being answered. And not just once - what makes this program unique is that it's ongoing. Kids are encouraged to be a part of the process throughout.

"It just made them so much more comfortable coming out into the unit and high-fiving the nurses and just being a part of this journey that involved our whole family," says their mom, Kim Meacham.

Without programs like this, experts say siblings can become angry or withdrawn and often their grades will drop. This program at Nationwide Children's Hospital has been so successful it has been recognized as a model program by the national sibling support organization called Super-Sibs.

*Rates of Incidence, National Childhood Cancer Foundation, retrieved from their website December 2007, http://www.curesearch.org

Ohio State University Medical Center